Congratulations on choosing to pursue a career in Pirating! Here is the course load for the year.
-Getting the Words Right to "Yo Ho Ho and a Bottle of Rum"
Not to be confused with "Har Har Har and a Bucket of Ale".
This course will teach you all the right lyrics so you don't look dumb in front of the other Pirates.
-Keeping Your Hat on at a Proper Rakish Angle:
Pull off that dashing Pirate look and even the top dogs of the Pirating world will have to take you seriously.
-Laughing Loudly and Jumping off High Things:
A must-know in battle.
-Charming Bar Room Wenches:
Love is hard to come by when you haven't shaved or brushed your teeth in six years. Learn all the tricks and tips.
-Witty Banter While Sword Fighting:
You're not a true rouge unless you get in a few verbal jabs alongside your physical ones. Learn to accompany your sword with your vicious tongue in this informative class, and you'll be the terror of the high seas!
-Proper Pirate Terms and Slang:
When someone threatens to give you The Black Spot, do you think of your dog? Then it's time to get to class and learn the terms! Then you'll know to punch the next Pirate who says he'll swash your buckle.
-Sacking and Pillaging 101:
Learn the art of setting things on fire, bombing small costal towns, and firing on friendly ships.
-How to Read Maps Drawn by People Who Cannot Write:
Get an education in deciphering crude drawings. Find the treasure every time.
-Avoiding the Cracken 101:
How to make sure you won't end up as monster food.
-Picking out a Proper Shoulder Parrot:
Finding the right parrot for you personality. Or at least one that won't annoy the shit out of you.
Now that you know your course load, feel free to roam campus and get settled in.
Please refrain from shooting or stabbing your class mates until term is over.
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